When I Think About You in the Back of My Mind

by Tedria Smith

It was foggy Saturday night when it rained, and we sat in the car and carried an endless
conversation after years. That one night unpacked so many unspoken things between us. You
could feel the uneasiness suffocating us like a sauna. It was a quiet Sunday night when those
unspoken words between us turned into real emotion. The air seemed thin and it was easier to
breathe around each other. No forced conversation, and endless jokes. We touched the way
hands do loved ones. I laughed until tears formed in my eyes and my stomach ached and my
heart fluttered. It was a warm Monday afternoon when I realized you were departing again.
How quickly you come back into somebody’s life to leave again. I guess that is your job now.
You say that once you are gone, we will stay connected this time. I believe that is too good to
be true. It was a breezy Tuesday morning when you boarded the plane. You said you’ll end up
being a ghost in my past again. Soon after you call me to address the matter of concern. You
say you were just chatting, but I know deep down that becoming a ghost of my past again will
haunt you. Distance will bury us again. Distance will won’t fill the void. Distance will bring new
people into our lives. It will make the thought of each other disappear quickly. Numbers will
change and there will be no way of speaking. Our words will be back to their unspoken bond.
Were our nights of endless conversation worth it after all these years? How quickly you come
back into somebody’s life to leave again. I guess that is your job now.