It’s a Love Hate Thing

by Tashari Ferguson

Do you see me
as you look in the mirror?
My damp coils
fall beautifully on your shoulders
The sweet aroma
of blueberry lotions
and conditioner
is the pure bliss
that detangles me
from the rejection
of society
It’s ironic
how holding your fist high
in the eye of the public
while having me
in my natural state
shows how much you love me
but behind closed doors
you manipulate me
When I don’t meet your expectations
you interlace me in rows
to hide your reality
The fantasy
of having a different texture
can’t always cure your sadness
The thick cap
engulfs me in a wrath
I’m trying to see the beauty
of the world but you’re hindering me
from freedom
Do you understand
it’s hard to vitiate your actions?

Do you see me
as you look in the mirror?
Pieces of me
drop to the ground
as you try to repair me
Let the water hydrate each part of me
Saturate my roots
with oil and use your fingers
to massage the tension away
Did you miss me?
The towel
soaks up my tears
but the ends of me are damaged
Use the viscous products
to make me whole again
My damp coils
fall beautifully on your shoulders again
but this time it’s different
The protraction
of being free
and feeling the breeze
as my roots breathe
is pleasant
and the sun
highlights the beauty of my texture
It doesn’t matter
how many times you try
to put me away
or cut me
I’ll always grow back

But hey, it’s a love hate thing.